11,453 Found Dead        Tired After Cancer Benefit Walk

The scene was incredibly heavy this morning after the annual California Walk For the Cure cancer benefit. Of the 12,000 walkers, 11,453 were found dead tired at the conclusion of the benefit.

“I didn’t know that walking could be so tiresome,” said Bob Chipman, CEO of TweetWhomblr. “This is the last time I plan on doing something like this.”

Emergency aid was refused by the National Guard.

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